Charity's Blog

Life Lessons


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My Phantom Girl


It has been about two years since my cat; Phantom passed away and memories of her come fluttering through my mind. She was elderly, but in good shape for her years, maintaining her weight at eight and a half pounds. She was a trooper until the end. On her last evening, she comfortably laid down on our lawn and went in her sleep. I, imagine that she did not suffer.

A week or two prior I did notice that her walk was stiff. She was not as agile as a young kitty. I adopted Phantom from my dear friend, Joyce. Phantom and her family found their way to her house. Joyce took notice; she got all of them taken care of at the Vets and eventually found homes for all of them. Joyce and I worked together at the time.

One day, she approached me about adopting. I was unsure whether I should take on another pet. I did not have the best of luck with pets, plus I tend to get very attached to animals.

Finally, I agreed for Joyce to bring the cat to my house. From the moment, I saw her; I was in love,  so beautiful with all those colors of brown, rust and black. She was a calico cat, plus she had the extra toes like a Hemingway or a snowshoe cat. The best part, she looked like she was wearing a mask, half across her face was black and the other beige which made her green eyes appear even brighter.

Phantom, as a young cat she was very adventurous. My first scare with her? She lodged herself somehow behind the kitchen cabinet. I could not figure out how she did it. I thought I’d have to break the cabinet to rescue her, but she came out on her own.

On other occasions, she would jump from one wall shelf to another. Oh and the frosting on the cake? She would climb the center of our tree at Christmas time. I would not notice until the tree would tremble, tree ornaments would come flying off. She decided to do these activities at night. In case you did not know, cats are nocturnal. She was a challenge during that time, but she eventually outgrew all of those habits.

As an older cat, she liked coming in and out of the house. She hunted I did not like the idea at all especially when she would leave me what was left over from her hunt in front of our walkway.

With all of the challenges along the way I loved Phantom. She would make any owner proud. She was as loyal as can be. If I were sick,  she would jump on my bed, and I would feel her wet nose as she touched mine. It was her way of making sure that I was okay.

The memories of my Phantom Girl will always be in my heart.

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No Sleep!


When you cannot sleep and don’t know why. The root cause? Your body has shut down, but your mind has not. If you were to describe your body as a machine. The principal control center won’t shut down, but if it does(sleep). The other parts will follow…too many times sleep has been taken. It does not happen often but, when it does… it makes for a long night.

Ways you can cope

  • You can choose to watch a program on television.
  • Read a book that will help you relax.
  • Write your thoughts down.
  • Keep an ongoing journal.
  • Choose a movie.
  • Play a game on the computer.

There are no quick solutions, but anything that can help is a welcomed blessing.


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We Evolved!


Giving the one you love, an opportunity to prove that you are most important, and then you are let down. What will it take for you to see that things will not change?

Reality check! You need to change because he will not. What is keeping you back? What are you afraid of?

Thinking back: The evening was nice with friends. We had a blast, but once it was all over and came home? Things went back to the usual routine. Meaning? The television went on and off he went towards that realm.

If I had my way…the ” tele” would be removed from our bedroom.

It is sad, I have been more of a friend than his wife. Yes, he is my best friend but where do I draw the line?

I expect more out of us! We have evolved and the people we were are no longer who we are.